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July 28, 2009
Combat Job Search Rejection with Resilience
Resilience. Stick-to-itiveness. Takes a lickin’, keeps on tickin’.
Just a few thoughts that stay top of mind as I ride the ups and downs of the quest for a new job. Admittedly, it takes a pretty tough coating on your ego to handle the repeated rejections. Not all rejections are an outright, “No, we are not offering you the position.” Rather, a good quantity of rejections are more subtle, yet still take their toll.
So how do I dust myself off, pick up and just keep going? While it sounds really simple, it takes a good deal of emotional and psychological strength to pull myself up by the bootstraps every morning and go at it again. For me, I think about analogous experiences whereby I learned to go for the goal again and again. I have built up my personal resilience over the years through a variety of lessons. As I scroll back in my memory banks, I think of my years in competitive swimming. Every day, I was back in that pool for two more hours to perfect my strokes and improve my strength. Negative feedback in swimming comes to you every time your swim mates beat you to the wall. If you don’t persevere in improving your swimming, you don’t go for the gold (or in this case, goal).
If you didn’t play sports, perhaps you can leverage other challenging situations as training for the rollercoaster ride that is job seeking, like something as straightforward as making the world’s best pancakes for your kids. My boys, Owen and Evan, are always amazed at their Mom’s various attempts at improving this Saturday morning ritual. Perhaps my being trained as a chemist makes my pancakes way too scientific and not yummy enough? The various ingredients that make up the world’s best pancakes are analogous to the various job experiences that make up your resume. Just as you need the right balance of job experiences showcased just so on your resume, you need the right balance of ingredients to make fluffy pancakes. Too much flour (or bland job description details), and the result is too dense and dry. An extra flourish, like vanilla (or using numbers and bullets to highlight accomplishments), and you’re providing something tasty for consumption.
As a bit of a history buff, I’ve always admired Teddy Roosevelt’s difficult youth given poor health and how he took hard consequent steps to build up his robustness. So much so, that he ended up with the toughest job in the country. Lastly, I may be a bit of a romantic or slightly pollyann-ish, but I always thought that Scarlett O’Hara did a fine job in summing up her resilience: “Tomorrow, is another day.”
How do you pull yourself together after rejection? Or how do you best bring a positive, fresh start to again charging up the mountain of finding a new job?
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Posted by Jane Allerton on July 28, 2009 at 01:55 PM in Job Search | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBack (0)
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Comments
Good post, but is there any progress that you could measure aside from being hired or not? It seems that having to start from 'the beginning' each day would be very hard to take after a while (I know that you aren't really starting from the beginning - but how can you prove that to yourself?).
Do you do things differently? Do you work harder? Basically, how to you change (or do you change) your search when you get a 'setback' and are there things that could help you see progress even without getting hired? Using your analogy, you can 'see' how many seconds you were behind the winner in a swim-race, but you don't get that feedback in the job-search, it is all or nothing. There is no 'second-place'. So is there a better way to keep yourself motivated without 'forcing it'?
Here's an article with a different twist: http://virtualjobcoach.com/blog/?p=1414
Posted by: Will at Virtualjobcoach | Jul 29, 2009 3:02:51 PM
I think you make a lot of valid points. I never thought about using other anologys ( pancakes) as a tool for being able to go through rejections for a job. While there is still a hard road ahead, I think you need to try at least several approaches not only to applying for jobs but to learn from the rejected positions(what would have been a more persuavsive answer?)
Posted by: wandag | Aug 11, 2009 10:54:27 AM
As a manufacturing professional that has had his share of job changes due to the ever increasing off-shoring, mergers and productivity increases that continue to erode the total number of manufacturing opportunities here in the US, I feel it is my duty to share my experiences.
First realize that you will never please everyone. No matter how much time, money and agony you spend in creating your resume and/or cover letter, it will never please everyone, so stop beating yourself up when you don't hear from that company or recruiter. Chalk it up to personality and taste differences. Just like culture in a company, not everyone fits into every culture. Move on.
Realize that there will always be situations that no matter how well qualified you are, that competitor that worked for that other company or went to that other school may have more in common with the employer than your history shows. People like people like themselves. It's human nature to surround yourself with others like you. Don't get down on yourself. It is what it is. Move on.
Be sure to talk with colleagues and network with new people all the time. It will help to keep your spirits up and give you new ideas or ways to approach challenges.
Have a daily schedule, just like a job and stick to it. Measure your accomplishments (quality is more important than quality).
Get away from your work occasionally and take breaks. Clear your head and comeback to challenges so you see them from a different point of view.
Realize that it only takes one chance to get that job. Even with the challenging economy, perseverance will get you what you seek. Never give up. Be aggressive and tell prespective employers what you do and how you are the best at it. Be a sales person who is selling you.
Always be prepared. There is an old saying that goes like this. "Chance favors the prepared mind." Need I say more.
Good Luck
Ron
Posted by: Ron Jacques | Aug 12, 2009 8:28:04 PM
Hello Ron: thanks much for sharing your experiences and observations. Very astute, in particular your points about personality fit in a new organization. While this resonance with a new employer lies mostly with the folks you interview with, you are right in realizing that not everyone can please everyone. For example, I learned that takeaway when interviewing for my last company, which involved 9 full-day interviews and over 50 people...and that was in excellent economic times! Finally, it took the push of a top executive to get me over that hurdle of not pleasing precisely every one of those 50 folks. And your notation of moving on in several avenues is well put! I agree that dwelling on an event in the job quest is only self-limiting.
I like your advice about sticking to a schedule and striving to acheive quality results every single day. Do you recall your single best day in accomplishments in job searching? What stood out about that particular day?
Given your resilience, Ron, how is your job hunt progressing? How do you feel that your personal resilience has made a difference in your networking or other search activities?
Granted the times are not easy at all, but there are beacons of light out in the marketplace. We shall land in a safe harbor soon. All the best in your search, Jane
Posted by: jane allerton | Aug 21, 2009 7:01:43 AM